Four plays worth $396.79 for $49.
WHAT. A. STEAL.
A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum,
The Importance of Being Earnest,
Macbeth,
and
West Side Story,
Beautiful, sweet, romantic Stratford,
HERE I COOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMME.
I love dates with the Lord and James Dean the SLR.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
It's a Record
In the past month and a half I've managed to accrue a grand total of EIGHT tickets. :(
The stereotype of a female Asian driver lives on!
The stereotype of a female Asian driver lives on!
Over the Speed Limit
Yet again, I've pushed myself beyond my limits. My body drags for want of sleep and alone time. I don't think I've chilled by myself for 8 hours since August. Will I never learn?
I think I'm going to self-enforce a curfew now a.k.a. discipline.
9pm Weeknights.
12am One Weekend Night.
I think I'm going to self-enforce a curfew now a.k.a. discipline.
9pm Weeknights.
12am One Weekend Night.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Five Good Things (That I'm Looking Forward To)
I NEVER look forward to winter, but for some reason this year I am.
1. Peppermint Mocha @ Starbucks
2. A day of Saturday shooting in the cold, and then ducking into one of my quaint coffee shops for a steaming mug of delicious hot chocolate and a relaxing quiet time with the Lord.
3. Shoot in a blizzard when the entire city grinds to a complete halt because of the snow.
4. Ice Skating. I am determined to learn this year.
5. The holiday cheer.
1. Peppermint Mocha @ Starbucks
2. A day of Saturday shooting in the cold, and then ducking into one of my quaint coffee shops for a steaming mug of delicious hot chocolate and a relaxing quiet time with the Lord.
3. Shoot in a blizzard when the entire city grinds to a complete halt because of the snow.
4. Ice Skating. I am determined to learn this year.
5. The holiday cheer.
Monday, October 19, 2009
There Are Days...
And shall I pray thee change thy will, Father,
Until it be according to mine?
But no, Lord, no, that shall never be, rather,
I pray thee blend my human will with thine.
I pray thee hush the hurrying, eager longing,
I pray thee soothe the pangs of keen desire,
See in my quiet places wishes thronging,
Forbid them, Lord, purge, though it be with fire.
And work in me to will and do thy pleasure,
Let all within me, peaceful, reconciled,
Tarry content my Wellbeloved's leisure,
At last, at last, even as a weaned child.
~Amy Carmichael
As quoted by Elisabeth Elliot in her book, These Strange Ashes
Until it be according to mine?
But no, Lord, no, that shall never be, rather,
I pray thee blend my human will with thine.
I pray thee hush the hurrying, eager longing,
I pray thee soothe the pangs of keen desire,
See in my quiet places wishes thronging,
Forbid them, Lord, purge, though it be with fire.
And work in me to will and do thy pleasure,
Let all within me, peaceful, reconciled,
Tarry content my Wellbeloved's leisure,
At last, at last, even as a weaned child.
~Amy Carmichael
As quoted by Elisabeth Elliot in her book, These Strange Ashes
The Weight That Hinders
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. (NIV)
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us...(ESV)
Hebrews 12:1
These days when I run, I carry only two things;
1) my iPod
2) my spare set of keys because it's just two keys not a whole whack load of jangling keychains.
I use to carry my water bottle with me as well, but even my 500ml was too much of a weight. Sometimes even carrying the iPod is irksome as I jog. I've stripped myself down to the bare minimum; laying aside every weight that hinders... because it just made sense.
Which made me wonder during the Toronto Zoo run if I've done that spiritually.
Someone once wrote that not everything that hinders is a sin.
What in my life is an unnecessary weight that is hindering me?
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us...(ESV)
Hebrews 12:1
These days when I run, I carry only two things;
1) my iPod
2) my spare set of keys because it's just two keys not a whole whack load of jangling keychains.
I use to carry my water bottle with me as well, but even my 500ml was too much of a weight. Sometimes even carrying the iPod is irksome as I jog. I've stripped myself down to the bare minimum; laying aside every weight that hinders... because it just made sense.
Which made me wonder during the Toronto Zoo run if I've done that spiritually.
Someone once wrote that not everything that hinders is a sin.
What in my life is an unnecessary weight that is hindering me?
Sunday, October 18, 2009
The PDF of Running
Running was never on any of my to do lists, and it was never going to be on any lists because running was painful, (it still is!), and it required; Perseverance, Discipline, and Focus. I would've never believed you in a million years if you had told me a month ago that I would be going out of my way to work running into my busy schedule so that I could run on average 15km+ a week. I never thought that I would be even able to run 5k much less do it on a regular basis. This again just goes to prove the point "never say never."
Yet now I enjoy running for the exact same reasons that I detested it in the first place, Perseverance, Discipline, and Focus. It requires these three qualities, and at the same time it hones them. Running teaches me to mentally persevere when the going gets tough and when every step of the way I want to quit and walk. It makes me get up early in the morning so I can actually get a run in, and that forces me to be disciplined with the rest of my schedule. But best of all it makes me focus on the Lord.
For some reason when I run, it puts my life into perspective in the big scheme of things. Christ becomes first, and all the little idols of my life melt away. At the same time I can't run long unless I am focused on either breathing properly or on God. It's fascinating. I can't daze off. Can't daydream. I have to focus.
It still baffles me. I'm still trying to figure out what flipped the switch, but I'm loving it.
The Apostle Paul knew what he was talking about when he used running analogies in the New Testament.
Hebrews 12:1 kept me going at the tail end of my first race yesterday.
Yet now I enjoy running for the exact same reasons that I detested it in the first place, Perseverance, Discipline, and Focus. It requires these three qualities, and at the same time it hones them. Running teaches me to mentally persevere when the going gets tough and when every step of the way I want to quit and walk. It makes me get up early in the morning so I can actually get a run in, and that forces me to be disciplined with the rest of my schedule. But best of all it makes me focus on the Lord.
For some reason when I run, it puts my life into perspective in the big scheme of things. Christ becomes first, and all the little idols of my life melt away. At the same time I can't run long unless I am focused on either breathing properly or on God. It's fascinating. I can't daze off. Can't daydream. I have to focus.
It still baffles me. I'm still trying to figure out what flipped the switch, but I'm loving it.
The Apostle Paul knew what he was talking about when he used running analogies in the New Testament.
Hebrews 12:1 kept me going at the tail end of my first race yesterday.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
On Second Thought
I would feel really bad if the prank wasn't so much a prank as much as it was a "here's a nice thing to do." EEK.
Five Good Things
1. My small group. Love, love, LOVE them.
2. Runner's high.
3. Being the official favorite staff member of someone I don't disciple. :P
4. Free henna. SO preeetttttttty.
5. Reviving plants instead of killing them.
2. Runner's high.
3. Being the official favorite staff member of someone I don't disciple. :P
4. Free henna. SO preeetttttttty.
5. Reviving plants instead of killing them.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Birthday Prank
This is what I found in my purse the day after my birthday.
In case you can't read it, it says:
"Happy birthday! Love your secret admirer. xoxo"
Siiiiigh. It's not even just "like", it's "love". Not only that, I also got two hugs (x's) and two kisses (o's). And, AND, JUST look at the box that it came it. It must have cost...at the very least, $5 in total. It wasn't dollar store for sure! No, because I'm too good for dollar store gifts.
Be still, my heart. I'm floored. Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh. AGAIN. [sic] :P
You might wonder if the the thought that this isn't a prank ever crossed my mind...
According to my expert friend K.V. since it wasn't a dead animal left on my doorstep, it definitely doesn't fall into the admirer category, which leaves us with just plain prank.
So this is what I get after I entrust my personal belongings to friends because I didn't want to lug around heavy bags downtown whilst celebrating my birthday... :P
I'm not so much curious about whodunnit, but ...WHERE they actually bought the lipstick holder. And yes, it's a lipstick holder. I wasn't quite sure what it was until I saw the little tag on the box. It said:
ITEM# 0029BG
6"H CREAM VELVET LIPSTICK HOLDER
(c) 2005 POPULAR CREATIONS
A Division of Popular Imports
S. Plainfield, NJ 07080
Made in China
It's like from the days of Pride and Prejudice. I can't believe that THEY STILL SELL THESE THINGS?!
In case you can't read it, it says:
"Happy birthday! Love your secret admirer. xoxo"
Siiiiigh. It's not even just "like", it's "love". Not only that, I also got two hugs (x's) and two kisses (o's). And, AND, JUST look at the box that it came it. It must have cost...at the very least, $5 in total. It wasn't dollar store for sure! No, because I'm too good for dollar store gifts.
Be still, my heart. I'm floored. Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh. AGAIN. [sic] :P
You might wonder if the the thought that this isn't a prank ever crossed my mind...
According to my expert friend K.V. since it wasn't a dead animal left on my doorstep, it definitely doesn't fall into the admirer category, which leaves us with just plain prank.
So this is what I get after I entrust my personal belongings to friends because I didn't want to lug around heavy bags downtown whilst celebrating my birthday... :P
I'm not so much curious about whodunnit, but ...WHERE they actually bought the lipstick holder. And yes, it's a lipstick holder. I wasn't quite sure what it was until I saw the little tag on the box. It said:
ITEM# 0029BG
6"H CREAM VELVET LIPSTICK HOLDER
(c) 2005 POPULAR CREATIONS
A Division of Popular Imports
S. Plainfield, NJ 07080
Made in China
It's like from the days of Pride and Prejudice. I can't believe that THEY STILL SELL THESE THINGS?!
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Quotes
From the funny to the wise.
"You guys boil beans and then call it a dessert."
~A.S. referring to the Chinese people's red bean soup.
In its defense, it's GREAT. I make it ALL the time.
"Attraction is a funny thing."
~J.C. on how it's quite difficult that two people would be attracted to each other at the same time, at the RIGHT time.
I wholeheartedly agree.
"Don't enjoy something that's not yours."
~E.L. on guarding your heart.
Touche.
"You guys boil beans and then call it a dessert."
~A.S. referring to the Chinese people's red bean soup.
In its defense, it's GREAT. I make it ALL the time.
"Attraction is a funny thing."
~J.C. on how it's quite difficult that two people would be attracted to each other at the same time, at the RIGHT time.
I wholeheartedly agree.
"Don't enjoy something that's not yours."
~E.L. on guarding your heart.
Touche.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Perspective
There's something about being away that gives you new perspective on life.
Now to keep that perspective when I return to Toronto.
Now to keep that perspective when I return to Toronto.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Between Friends
L.L.: Why don't you watch the office?
Me: Because it frustrates me?
L.L.: Evangelism is frustrating sometimes, but you still do it.
Me: Evangelism is Biblical. The office isn't.
L.L.: How do you know? There was a Bible quote in it the other day.
Me: It's a Biblical mandate to evangelize. It's not a Biblical mandate to watch the office.
L.L.: Maybe it's in there.
Me: Well you find it and let me know.
A few minutes later...
Me: I'm going to blog our conversation.
L.L.: You should just watch another one.
Me: No, I refuse.
L.L.: You're just being stubborn.
I concur.
And will continue to be stubborn.
Smile.
Me: Because it frustrates me?
L.L.: Evangelism is frustrating sometimes, but you still do it.
Me: Evangelism is Biblical. The office isn't.
L.L.: How do you know? There was a Bible quote in it the other day.
Me: It's a Biblical mandate to evangelize. It's not a Biblical mandate to watch the office.
L.L.: Maybe it's in there.
Me: Well you find it and let me know.
A few minutes later...
Me: I'm going to blog our conversation.
L.L.: You should just watch another one.
Me: No, I refuse.
L.L.: You're just being stubborn.
I concur.
And will continue to be stubborn.
Smile.
Random Thoughts That Were Floating in My Head From My First Wedding Shoot
FYI: We got up at 5am and pulled a 17 hour day without any coffee. Keep this in mind.
* Do NOT forget the camera. Whatever you do, do NOT forget the camera.
* To Lydia: I'm just waking up...the pictures are getting better.
(This is 3 hours later.)
* I'm so hungry.
* Foooooooooooooooooooooooooooood.
* Note to self: if you are ever getting married, don't do an early morning wedding.
* Wow, there must be hundreds if not thousands of dollars worth of makeup in that little suitcase.
(That the make-up artist brought along.)
* I decapitated the groom!!!
(I broke the head off the groom cake statue by accident.....they glued it back on. Apparently it had broke before.)
* I can't wait to go to Starbucks for a coffee and a breakfast sandwhich.
* Note to self: lanterns are pretty.
* This is rather bittersweet.
(At the bride's entrance.)
* Thank God I can't understand French that well, I'd be so distracted from shooting.
* I hope I'm not blocking anyone's view.
* Errr....I hope I'm not flashing anyone. I forgot these jeans were low rise.
(I had to squat a lot.)
* Should've worn flats that didn't match the outfit. It's kind awkward walking around in these heels.
* I hate this lighting, I hate this lighting, I hate this lighting, I hate this lighting...
(I hate fluorescent lighting.)
* One word: ELOPE.
(I don't really want to elope, but during the middle of the day, I did.)
* Sleeeeeeeep.
* Mhmmm...McDonald's. I'd get a Big Mac meal and a Filet O'Fish meal. And fries. Mhmm...fries.
* Note to self: You'd have to do pictures before the ceremony for an afternoon wedding. Have a morning wedding, but plan in nap time.
* When can I get seconds?
(After finishing my meal at the lunch reception.)
* I'm impressed. My reading skills in french aren't that bad considering the little attention I paid in class in high school.
* Fall weddings are soooo pretty. Too bad, I'll never have one.
(Staff blackout dates.)
* If I had good lighting all the time, my life would be perfect.
* I can't wait to go to bed.
* I've still a loooooooot to learn.
(Pondering my pwnage by fluorescent lighting.)
* Should've been born Quebecois. They're loud, rowdy, and fun. I'd fit right in. Instead of being shamed for it.
* Sleep. I want to sleep. SLEEP!
* Do NOT forget the camera. Whatever you do, do NOT forget the camera.
* To Lydia: I'm just waking up...the pictures are getting better.
(This is 3 hours later.)
* I'm so hungry.
* Foooooooooooooooooooooooooooood.
* Note to self: if you are ever getting married, don't do an early morning wedding.
* Wow, there must be hundreds if not thousands of dollars worth of makeup in that little suitcase.
(That the make-up artist brought along.)
* I decapitated the groom!!!
(I broke the head off the groom cake statue by accident.....they glued it back on. Apparently it had broke before.)
* I can't wait to go to Starbucks for a coffee and a breakfast sandwhich.
* Note to self: lanterns are pretty.
* This is rather bittersweet.
(At the bride's entrance.)
* Thank God I can't understand French that well, I'd be so distracted from shooting.
* I hope I'm not blocking anyone's view.
* Errr....I hope I'm not flashing anyone. I forgot these jeans were low rise.
(I had to squat a lot.)
* Should've worn flats that didn't match the outfit. It's kind awkward walking around in these heels.
* I hate this lighting, I hate this lighting, I hate this lighting, I hate this lighting...
(I hate fluorescent lighting.)
* One word: ELOPE.
(I don't really want to elope, but during the middle of the day, I did.)
* Sleeeeeeeep.
* Mhmmm...McDonald's. I'd get a Big Mac meal and a Filet O'Fish meal. And fries. Mhmm...fries.
* Note to self: You'd have to do pictures before the ceremony for an afternoon wedding. Have a morning wedding, but plan in nap time.
* When can I get seconds?
(After finishing my meal at the lunch reception.)
* I'm impressed. My reading skills in french aren't that bad considering the little attention I paid in class in high school.
* Fall weddings are soooo pretty. Too bad, I'll never have one.
(Staff blackout dates.)
* If I had good lighting all the time, my life would be perfect.
* I can't wait to go to bed.
* I've still a loooooooot to learn.
(Pondering my pwnage by fluorescent lighting.)
* Should've been born Quebecois. They're loud, rowdy, and fun. I'd fit right in. Instead of being shamed for it.
* Sleep. I want to sleep. SLEEP!
Saturday, October 10, 2009
24
Really?
...wow.
I definitely don't feel like it.
Already?
Even though there's only one year's difference between 23 and 24, I feel like there's a significant change between 23 and 24.
I feel the need to stop dinking around, and actually grow up now.
No profound thoughts.
Just, let's get it together now and go hard.
...wow.
I definitely don't feel like it.
Already?
Even though there's only one year's difference between 23 and 24, I feel like there's a significant change between 23 and 24.
I feel the need to stop dinking around, and actually grow up now.
No profound thoughts.
Just, let's get it together now and go hard.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
My Old Man
Just got an email from my (step) dad. My real dad for all intents and purposes.
You know your regular email, trying to encourage me in work and in life. It brought tears to my eyes.
I miss my daddy.
2.5 more months until home.
You know your regular email, trying to encourage me in work and in life. It brought tears to my eyes.
I miss my daddy.
2.5 more months until home.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Happy Birthday To Me
Yesterday my doctor gave me my next three months worth of antidepressants.
Thank you doctor and Jesus.
That was around $200 worth of meds. Hello!
The asian in me, is purrrrrrrrrring.
Thank you doctor and Jesus.
That was around $200 worth of meds. Hello!
The asian in me, is purrrrrrrrrring.
Still Very Much Enamoured
I have finally found a band worthy of my unending love, admiration, and devotion.
Oh U2.
I've listened to the No Line On the Horizon album nonstop since the concert a week and a half ago. Man it seems so much time has passed since, but it just gets better and better.
My favourite lines from the album.
"Every beauty needs to go out with an idiot."
~ I'll Go Crazy If I Don't Go Crazy Tonight
"Hey, sexy boots. Get on your boots."
~ Get On Your Boots
"Stop helping God across the road like a little old lady."
~ Stand Up Comedy
"Stand up to rock stars, Napolean is in high heels
Josephine, be careful of small men with big ideas"
~ Stand Up Comedy
Ok, granted some of them, fine, all of them are weird taken by themselves, but the way Bono enunciates the words combined with the Edge's guitar... it's just great.
Let's see now...last time they were in town, it was three years ago. So assuming it's going to take them three more years to come back, it'll be in 2012. All the more time to save up for a prime ticket. Mhmmm. Mhmmmm. Mhmmm
Oh U2.
I've listened to the No Line On the Horizon album nonstop since the concert a week and a half ago. Man it seems so much time has passed since, but it just gets better and better.
My favourite lines from the album.
"Every beauty needs to go out with an idiot."
~ I'll Go Crazy If I Don't Go Crazy Tonight
"Hey, sexy boots. Get on your boots."
~ Get On Your Boots
"Stop helping God across the road like a little old lady."
~ Stand Up Comedy
"Stand up to rock stars, Napolean is in high heels
Josephine, be careful of small men with big ideas"
~ Stand Up Comedy
Ok, granted some of them, fine, all of them are weird taken by themselves, but the way Bono enunciates the words combined with the Edge's guitar... it's just great.
Let's see now...last time they were in town, it was three years ago. So assuming it's going to take them three more years to come back, it'll be in 2012. All the more time to save up for a prime ticket. Mhmmm. Mhmmmm. Mhmmm
Monday, September 28, 2009
Five Good Things
1. Good deals at Value Village.
2. Playing chess with roomies. We're keeping a log too.
3. Fondue.
4. Buying myself birthday presents.
5. After church service traditions.
2. Playing chess with roomies. We're keeping a log too.
3. Fondue.
4. Buying myself birthday presents.
5. After church service traditions.
Awkwaaaaaaaaard...
Setting the context: S.J. and I are playing chess.
S.J.: "Is it raining?"
Me: "You're raining."
S.J.: "Your face is raining."
Me: "Your Mo-...Sorry."
S.J.: "Is it raining?"
Me: "You're raining."
S.J.: "Your face is raining."
Me: "Your Mo-...Sorry."
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Taking Grace For Granted
I hear it all the time.
God is gracious.
His grace is unlimited.
By His grace...
The word grace or some version of it is thrown around so often that I've taken it for granted.
"Yeah, of course, God is gracious. That's who He is."
Grace becomes assumed, expected, and undervalued.
But I forget the cost of grace. The pain of it all.
I forget what has to be endured and born so that grace can be extended because someone has to shoulder the consequences.
I forget until I have to give grace myself.
Grace is not easily given to others.
Grace is painful to give.
For me.
And more often than not it needs to be given, again and again, and again.
How much more painful it is for God.
How much more magnanimous is His character in this light.
How much worthy of praise is He.
God is gracious.
His grace is unlimited.
By His grace...
The word grace or some version of it is thrown around so often that I've taken it for granted.
"Yeah, of course, God is gracious. That's who He is."
Grace becomes assumed, expected, and undervalued.
But I forget the cost of grace. The pain of it all.
I forget what has to be endured and born so that grace can be extended because someone has to shoulder the consequences.
I forget until I have to give grace myself.
Grace is not easily given to others.
Grace is painful to give.
For me.
And more often than not it needs to be given, again and again, and again.
How much more painful it is for God.
How much more magnanimous is His character in this light.
How much worthy of praise is He.
Renege
Still selling Stella. Sigh.
In other news. I did 2.5 km in my second run since....high school?
5km is not looking so intimidating anymore.
AND, I've decided to train with C.K. for a triathlon next summer.
In other news. I did 2.5 km in my second run since....high school?
5km is not looking so intimidating anymore.
AND, I've decided to train with C.K. for a triathlon next summer.
Stella, How I Love Thee
Stella, I love you.
I can't believe I thought that I could live without you.
You've been so good to me these past eight years.
Steady, loyal, and trustworthy.
We've been through so much.
Ups and downs.
Good and bad.
I shan't try to leave you again.
We'll stay together for better or for worse.
In sickness and in health.
I promise to take you to your regular oil changes so that God-willing it's more health than sickness.
Through recessions and booms.
The insurance premium is bound to go down next year when I hit 25. We'll figure something out.
'Til death do us part.
Hopefully not in a car accident.
I'm keeping my car.
I can't believe I thought that I could live without you.
You've been so good to me these past eight years.
Steady, loyal, and trustworthy.
We've been through so much.
Ups and downs.
Good and bad.
I shan't try to leave you again.
We'll stay together for better or for worse.
In sickness and in health.
I promise to take you to your regular oil changes so that God-willing it's more health than sickness.
Through recessions and booms.
The insurance premium is bound to go down next year when I hit 25. We'll figure something out.
'Til death do us part.
Hopefully not in a car accident.
I'm keeping my car.
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Fall Feast
Being born one day and one year after someone on the staff team means that I have to share my birthday glory. Sigh. :P
S.A. and I are having a fall birthday bash with our team. I'm so excited.
Potential Menu
Main Dish
Shepherd's Pie
or
Stew, Dumplings with Fresh Bread
Side Dishes
Roast Squash
and/or
Stuffed Squash
and/or
Root Bake
Dessert
Hand Made Scones
Fresh Apple Crisp- made with handpick apples.
Drink
Apple Cider
S.A. and I are having a fall birthday bash with our team. I'm so excited.
Potential Menu
Main Dish
Shepherd's Pie
or
Stew, Dumplings with Fresh Bread
Side Dishes
Roast Squash
and/or
Stuffed Squash
and/or
Root Bake
Dessert
Hand Made Scones
Fresh Apple Crisp- made with handpick apples.
Drink
Apple Cider
Five Good Things
1. Dance parties
2. Dufflet cakes
3. U2
4. Sunrises
5. Friends that you can call anytime, anywhere about anything.
2. Dufflet cakes
3. U2
4. Sunrises
5. Friends that you can call anytime, anywhere about anything.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Mama's Recipes
C.K. always told me that someone told her it's a bad idea to try your mother-in-law's recipes because it'll never taste as good to your husband. Duly noted, but heck, it's bad enough trying MY mom's recipes especially since she cooks by taste and not by specific detailed recipes. Her recipes fall along the lines of "use some of this, some of that, and some of that... until it tastes right." Right.
The first thought after the first bite is always, "doesn't taste like mum's".
Tonight I made the BBQ spare ribs, chives- actually leeks with eggs, miso soup, and red bean soup. All for the first time, and all of which, were mummy's recipes with the exception of the miso soup. But then there's also something to be said for trying to duplicate something from a restaurant.
They weren't bad. It wasn't like when I first started cooking, and the first edition of everything went to feed the garbage, but it definitely wasn't mum's or the restaurant's.
Only the red bean soup tasted close to mum's.
But it didn't taste like crap, and L.W. was well fed and thought I should make a good pastor's wife. So I'm content.
Tomorrow: The Chicken Soup. Also a first a edition.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Tornado
Just remembered this song from high school tonight. Another sad one, but one of my favourites.
What's For Dinner
I know I'm recovering from burnout when I have a higher capacity and desire to cook. Having two friends over on different nights, and hosting a potluck this week. I'm serving:
Monday Night:
Sweet and Sour Spare Ribs (Alliteration not intended)
Chinese Chives and Eggs
Rice
Friday Night:
Handmade Wonton Soup
or
Orange Flavoured Porkchops
Stir Fry
Rice
(Haven't made up my mind yet.)
Saturday Night Potluck:
Five Spice Chicken Wings
For Myself For the Week:
Silken Chicken Soup with Bean Sprouts
Monday Night:
Sweet and Sour Spare Ribs (Alliteration not intended)
Chinese Chives and Eggs
Rice
Friday Night:
Handmade Wonton Soup
or
Orange Flavoured Porkchops
Stir Fry
Rice
(Haven't made up my mind yet.)
Saturday Night Potluck:
Five Spice Chicken Wings
For Myself For the Week:
Silken Chicken Soup with Bean Sprouts
Hodge Podge of Thoughts
1. Free movie, free mints, and free popcorn make a good night.
Saw Precious for free at the TIFF last night. Also got two boxes of free mints. Enough to last me until TIFF '10. Plus a bag of free popcorn. Post regarding Precious to come in future.
2. Blogging is relaxing. I forgot about this. Yeah for freedom of speech.
3. "Boys are oblivious only when they want to be." - L. Low
True words. Approximately a month before I see her awesomeness.
4. Everyday needs a dance party.
5. The scent of Fall is in the air, and I love it because it makes me feel like I'm in love. There's just something about fall. Definitely more of a romantic season than Spring. Sorry Spring.
6. Am really liking iced teas. Looking forward to making a plethora of iced teas even in the winter. So far have made raspberry, and white blueberry team. Mhmm.....
7. Am really getting into Soviet and Afghani history, the result of watching the Trotsky and reading A Thousand Splendid Suns
8. Loving Google earth. Fun times.
9. Really need to get on that church membership application that I started, but never completed three months ago.
Saw Precious for free at the TIFF last night. Also got two boxes of free mints. Enough to last me until TIFF '10. Plus a bag of free popcorn. Post regarding Precious to come in future.
2. Blogging is relaxing. I forgot about this. Yeah for freedom of speech.
3. "Boys are oblivious only when they want to be." - L. Low
True words. Approximately a month before I see her awesomeness.
4. Everyday needs a dance party.
5. The scent of Fall is in the air, and I love it because it makes me feel like I'm in love. There's just something about fall. Definitely more of a romantic season than Spring. Sorry Spring.
6. Am really liking iced teas. Looking forward to making a plethora of iced teas even in the winter. So far have made raspberry, and white blueberry team. Mhmm.....
7. Am really getting into Soviet and Afghani history, the result of watching the Trotsky and reading A Thousand Splendid Suns
8. Loving Google earth. Fun times.
9. Really need to get on that church membership application that I started, but never completed three months ago.
Whiners Are Wieners
Well I'm going to be a wiener and whine about this pain around my left ear which has now spread to my jaw.
It started two weeks ago and has gotten progressively worse. Saw the doc last week, who diagnosed it as an ear infection and gave me antibiotics and ear drops.
It didn't work. It's worse now.
Now in all my paranoid compulsive hypochondriac brilliance here's what I think may be possibly wrong:
1. Persistent earache
2. TMJ (Temporomandibular joint disorder) Go google it.
3. Wisdom tooth.
It's not so much painful as annoying because it inhibits my eating. I mean c'mon. Of all things, how dare you mess around with my FOOD?! If this persists I will have to raid the fridge of friends with toddlers and steal their baby food.
It started two weeks ago and has gotten progressively worse. Saw the doc last week, who diagnosed it as an ear infection and gave me antibiotics and ear drops.
It didn't work. It's worse now.
Now in all my paranoid compulsive hypochondriac brilliance here's what I think may be possibly wrong:
1. Persistent earache
2. TMJ (Temporomandibular joint disorder) Go google it.
3. Wisdom tooth.
It's not so much painful as annoying because it inhibits my eating. I mean c'mon. Of all things, how dare you mess around with my FOOD?! If this persists I will have to raid the fridge of friends with toddlers and steal their baby food.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Thursday, September 17, 2009
So It Starts
This morning I "started" my "training" for the Toronto Zoo run, and by training I mean, actually starting to run for the first time in goodness knows how long. And by started I mean, my body woke me up and wouldn't go back to bed so I had nothing else to do.
Other than that, it was great. The chilly air, the silence of the morning as everything's slowly rousing from slumber, the cramps that started kicking my sides after five minutes.
Ok, maybe not the cramps.
It was freeing though to bolt down the streets. It felt like flying.
This could be the start of a new romance.
...
Ok, that would be pushing it. The start of a symbiotic relationship then.
Other than that, it was great. The chilly air, the silence of the morning as everything's slowly rousing from slumber, the cramps that started kicking my sides after five minutes.
Ok, maybe not the cramps.
It was freeing though to bolt down the streets. It felt like flying.
This could be the start of a new romance.
...
Ok, that would be pushing it. The start of a symbiotic relationship then.
Temper, temper
I had naively thought that my temper had slowly dissipated over the years.
Nope.
Still there. Sigh.
Still got the RAWR in me.
Nope.
Still there. Sigh.
Still got the RAWR in me.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
What This Girl Wants
Well ladies and gentlemen, it's that time of the year again.
The leaves are turning, the air is starting to chill...
It's birthday time.
And in good capitalist fashion, here's my birthday wish list just to indulge in the materialistic side.
Fail Proof
1. H & M scarves
2. Starbucks mugs
3. Urban Decay makeup
4. Sushi
5. Art supplies
Here and There
1. iPod earbuds
2. Body Shop Scented Oil Burner. (The metallic ball one.)
3. Urban Decay Brown Eyeliner
4. Mika's album from 2007
5. Ansel Adams Photography Books
Pseudo Swede (Ikea)
1. Black "Lack" Bookshelf
2. Large Black Ribba Frames
3. 4" by 6" Black Ribba Shadow Boxes
4. Large Glass Vase
5. Black and White Floral Fabric to re-upholster my chairs
Flower Power
1. A pot of jasmine
2. A pot of orchids
3. Gerbers
4. Giant sunflowers
5. Black roses
Pies in the Skies
1. Adobe Creative Design Suite Premium
2. Rosetta Stone in French
3. Canon 50mm 1.8f Lense
4. Apple Time Capsule
5. Pearl Earrings
The leaves are turning, the air is starting to chill...
It's birthday time.
And in good capitalist fashion, here's my birthday wish list just to indulge in the materialistic side.
Fail Proof
1. H & M scarves
2. Starbucks mugs
3. Urban Decay makeup
4. Sushi
5. Art supplies
Here and There
1. iPod earbuds
2. Body Shop Scented Oil Burner. (The metallic ball one.)
3. Urban Decay Brown Eyeliner
4. Mika's album from 2007
5. Ansel Adams Photography Books
Pseudo Swede (Ikea)
1. Black "Lack" Bookshelf
2. Large Black Ribba Frames
3. 4" by 6" Black Ribba Shadow Boxes
4. Large Glass Vase
5. Black and White Floral Fabric to re-upholster my chairs
Flower Power
1. A pot of jasmine
2. A pot of orchids
3. Gerbers
4. Giant sunflowers
5. Black roses
Pies in the Skies
1. Adobe Creative Design Suite Premium
2. Rosetta Stone in French
3. Canon 50mm 1.8f Lense
4. Apple Time Capsule
5. Pearl Earrings
Monday, September 14, 2009
Unplanned
Sometimes the sweetest moments in life are the unplanned ones.
My original plan for tonight was to show my car, go home, read my pile of library books (a post in itself), and turn in early.
I ended up shooting the breeze with P.J. in the middle of Yonge street with a pink bum because I had planted (pun intended) myself in the middle of a bed of pink and purple flowers on the median, with cars zooming by on both sides of us. For two hours we chatted about what else? Guys and God. Because whenever there's talk about guys, there's always talk about God.
It was so sweet and memorable, sharing our heartaches and hopes, fears and feelings under the streetlights, while enjoying one last summer night before fall.
Tonight was impressed into my memory.
My original plan for tonight was to show my car, go home, read my pile of library books (a post in itself), and turn in early.
I ended up shooting the breeze with P.J. in the middle of Yonge street with a pink bum because I had planted (pun intended) myself in the middle of a bed of pink and purple flowers on the median, with cars zooming by on both sides of us. For two hours we chatted about what else? Guys and God. Because whenever there's talk about guys, there's always talk about God.
It was so sweet and memorable, sharing our heartaches and hopes, fears and feelings under the streetlights, while enjoying one last summer night before fall.
Tonight was impressed into my memory.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Five Good Things
1. Pao Fan
A chinese rice porridge concoction using leftovers. Basically, rice, water, whatever leftover you have, BOIL, and STIRR. It's GREAT, I swear.
2. Stilettos from the Aldo outlet
3. Accountability
4. My family away from family: the Kenyons
5. Chinese BBQ
A chinese rice porridge concoction using leftovers. Basically, rice, water, whatever leftover you have, BOIL, and STIRR. It's GREAT, I swear.
2. Stilettos from the Aldo outlet
3. Accountability
4. My family away from family: the Kenyons
5. Chinese BBQ
TIFF 2009
The TIFF, another reason why I love being Torontonian. It's one of the world's top four film festivals depending on who you talk to. Woot.
My Top Five TIFF Wish List
1. Cooking With Stella
I knew I recognized the director's last name when I saw it. He's Deepa Mehta's brother! That and the fact that Lisa Ray's in this movie sold me on it. AND it's Canadian.
2. Whip It
Ellen Page in Drew Barrymore's directorial debut about a girl who enters a roller derby
3. Good Hair
Chris Rock's documentary on black women's hair. I'm thinking this will be like Russell Peter's commentary on Indian culture?
4. Men Staring at Goats
George Clooney and Ewan MacGregor. Need I say more? The premise sounds pretty out there, but funny.
5. What's Your Raashee?
Bollywood. Period.
Oh, and I hope The Trotsky wins the People's Choice Awards. So clever, funny, and CANADIAN.
The other movie that I saw at the TIFF was City of Life and Death. It was about the Japanese invasion of Nanking.
Graphic.
Its images still disturb me every time they flit through my thoughts. The rape scenes were....
Hopefully some free passes to Israeli films this week will erase those mental images. Although as B.M. said, it's good to watch things that make you feel uncomfortable. Not rape scenes per se, but films that deal with somber subjects.
My Top Five TIFF Wish List
1. Cooking With Stella
I knew I recognized the director's last name when I saw it. He's Deepa Mehta's brother! That and the fact that Lisa Ray's in this movie sold me on it. AND it's Canadian.
2. Whip It
Ellen Page in Drew Barrymore's directorial debut about a girl who enters a roller derby
3. Good Hair
Chris Rock's documentary on black women's hair. I'm thinking this will be like Russell Peter's commentary on Indian culture?
4. Men Staring at Goats
George Clooney and Ewan MacGregor. Need I say more? The premise sounds pretty out there, but funny.
5. What's Your Raashee?
Bollywood. Period.
Oh, and I hope The Trotsky wins the People's Choice Awards. So clever, funny, and CANADIAN.
The other movie that I saw at the TIFF was City of Life and Death. It was about the Japanese invasion of Nanking.
Graphic.
Its images still disturb me every time they flit through my thoughts. The rape scenes were....
Hopefully some free passes to Israeli films this week will erase those mental images. Although as B.M. said, it's good to watch things that make you feel uncomfortable. Not rape scenes per se, but films that deal with somber subjects.
Sunday, September 06, 2009
Seize the Day
The last time I auditioned for something was back in university. There hasn't been anything to entice me since due to a lack of opportunity. Add on to that, the memories of the few auditions that I went for and bombed, and whatever incentive I would have had to audition dwindles. In fact, I can't recall a single audition for a show or a dance troupe that was successful.
Nevertheless this Tuesday night I'm going to stick my neck out to audition for a all girls swing dance troupe. I haven't taken any of the lessons or know any of the choreography so I'm going in cold turkey. I don't have all that much confidence in my dancing skills (see above paragraph), but the possibility of maybe making it and being a part is enough to tip the scale in the favour of going for it. If I make it, I get to perform and compete.
After all what have I got to lose? As my high school motto says, "carpe diem!"
Here's to hoping.
Nevertheless this Tuesday night I'm going to stick my neck out to audition for a all girls swing dance troupe. I haven't taken any of the lessons or know any of the choreography so I'm going in cold turkey. I don't have all that much confidence in my dancing skills (see above paragraph), but the possibility of maybe making it and being a part is enough to tip the scale in the favour of going for it. If I make it, I get to perform and compete.
After all what have I got to lose? As my high school motto says, "carpe diem!"
Here's to hoping.
Five Good Things
1. The Reservoir Lounge
Fabulous jazz music and great ambience.
2. The men on my staff team.
I appreciate the ladies too, but the guys deserve a shout-out of their own.
3. Holding and cuddling cute chubby babies.
4. Page CXVI
Love her rendition of old hymns
5. Cleaning
It's so therapeutic.
Fabulous jazz music and great ambience.
2. The men on my staff team.
I appreciate the ladies too, but the guys deserve a shout-out of their own.
3. Holding and cuddling cute chubby babies.
4. Page CXVI
Love her rendition of old hymns
5. Cleaning
It's so therapeutic.
Saturday, September 05, 2009
Self- Conscious
I really don't like it when I butcher people's names. It makes me so self-conscious. The fact that I'm Asian doesn't really help matters. I almost feel as if I SHOULD be able to pronounce (insert name that I can't pronounce here) because I am of non- white descent. Fortunately I have offended no one. (That I know of anyways.)
Thursday, September 03, 2009
Frustrated
Weariness burns the inside of my eyes like peroxide. And I should know because I accidentally placed contacts lenses soaked with solution containing peroxide in my eyes multiple times this summer. It hurt.
But that's what it has felt like for the past few days, and it's not for a lack of sleep. I've gotten my fair share of 8+ hours of sleep a night plus some major nap time in the afternoons, but lucidity still eludes me. I walk around in a haze of fatigue.
I had thought that my energy was returning to me this summer, but I guess I was wrong. With the increased pace of my life, my energy has dissipated even faster.
And I am very frustrated to the point of tears.
Because there are so many things that I want to do, that I would be able to do, if I was just healthy.
Recovery is taking too long...or so I think.
All the while I wonder, where is the gospel in this? How should I be preaching it to myself?
But that's what it has felt like for the past few days, and it's not for a lack of sleep. I've gotten my fair share of 8+ hours of sleep a night plus some major nap time in the afternoons, but lucidity still eludes me. I walk around in a haze of fatigue.
I had thought that my energy was returning to me this summer, but I guess I was wrong. With the increased pace of my life, my energy has dissipated even faster.
And I am very frustrated to the point of tears.
Because there are so many things that I want to do, that I would be able to do, if I was just healthy.
Recovery is taking too long...or so I think.
All the while I wonder, where is the gospel in this? How should I be preaching it to myself?
Monday, August 31, 2009
Overdue
I think I'm due for a good cry one of these days.
A nice, long, heaving, snotty, sob session that leaves you unable to breathe evenly, and perhaps a few hiccups to finish it off.
You know, just to relieve some stress and frustration.
[For all the guys out there, it's a good thing. Trust me.]
A nice, long, heaving, snotty, sob session that leaves you unable to breathe evenly, and perhaps a few hiccups to finish it off.
You know, just to relieve some stress and frustration.
[For all the guys out there, it's a good thing. Trust me.]
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Tonight...
Tonight,
the stress wears, the fatigue irks, and life weighs heavy for minute reasons.
solitude is desired, but loneliness pierces.
the heart sighs.
the stress wears, the fatigue irks, and life weighs heavy for minute reasons.
solitude is desired, but loneliness pierces.
the heart sighs.
Stuck In My Head
Songs that are currently stuck in my head:
1. Keri Hilson- Knock You Down
2. Shakira- She Wolf
3. Lady Gaga- Paparazzi
4. Jordin Sparks- Battlefield
5. Beyonce- Ego
1. Keri Hilson- Knock You Down
2. Shakira- She Wolf
3. Lady Gaga- Paparazzi
4. Jordin Sparks- Battlefield
5. Beyonce- Ego
Sunday, August 23, 2009
What Not To Do...
Ladies, you know the drill.
There's this guy friend that you're interested in, but there's no overt signs that he's into you. i.e. Like him actually having the chutzpah to tell you so and him pursuing you. There's the way that he looks at you and the way he says your name (or so you think), but officially there's nothing going on. You're "just friends". So you stick around, talking to him late into the night on {insert your favourite mode of instant messaging here}, hanging out one on one all the time, and so on and so forth, pretty much being the dude's pseudo girlfriend, all the while hoping that one day he'll wake up to the revelation that you're a goddess. Ok fine, at least to the fact that you're great for him, and THEN FINALLY he'd ask you out.
I know, because I was there too.
Flashback: 2003, Dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen.
'Twas the summer before university. Met the boy on my dragon boat team. Long story short, I talked to him EVERY night until 3am. When school started I would drive 40 minutes one way every weekend to see him or I would drive 40 out of my way to pick him up so we could go back to Toronto together. We hung out one on one, a LOT. In essence I was his pseudo girlfriend.
As our "friendship" progressively moved beyond "just friends" without any definition of the relationship I got impatient, confronted him, and received a "Let's just be friends" in return. (Don't do this either. If he doesn't have enough chutzpah to define the relationship, he's not worth your time.)
I spent a day and a half bawling at a friend's place before I could drive back to Guelph safely. Then I spent the next three months crying myself to sleep every night. Was that TMI?
Moral of the story?
Don't be a pseudo girlfriend.
i.e. Don't spend so much one on one time hanging out with a guy hoping he'd eventually ask you out.
Why?
Because it's dumb. Yeah, you heard me dumb. Harsh, but true, but it's tough love.
Why would anyone pay for something he already has?
In other words why would he take the risk to ask you out and commit to you when he already has unlimited access to your time, thoughts, company, and person? Because by being his pseudo girlfriend, you're giving him ALL of that without any need for commitment in return. SCORE! For him at least. Not so much for you.
Because in doing so you have just shot yourself in the foot, not once, not twice, but thrice. Assuming the goal is to enter into a meaningful relationship that has the potential to lead to marriage...
First Shot: You have now taken away any incentive for him to ask you out.
Second Shot: It now seems to other guys that you're totally into this dude so you've taken away any incentive for them to ask you out.
Third and Final Shot: You're wasting your time on a guy and a relationship that's not going anywhere.
So I know it's tempting when you like a guy friend, to spend every possible waking moment in his presence, hanging on to his every word, and etc...but DON'T DO IT. Whatever the reason you think it is for him not asking you out, you're probably over-analyzing. Don't hang on to it, and don't be a pseudo girlfriend. 'Tis not worth it.
Go read: Girl's Guide to Marrying Well
This is my second plug. It's THAT good.
Gentlemen, here's a link to your guide.
There's this guy friend that you're interested in, but there's no overt signs that he's into you. i.e. Like him actually having the chutzpah to tell you so and him pursuing you. There's the way that he looks at you and the way he says your name (or so you think), but officially there's nothing going on. You're "just friends". So you stick around, talking to him late into the night on {insert your favourite mode of instant messaging here}, hanging out one on one all the time, and so on and so forth, pretty much being the dude's pseudo girlfriend, all the while hoping that one day he'll wake up to the revelation that you're a goddess. Ok fine, at least to the fact that you're great for him, and THEN FINALLY he'd ask you out.
I know, because I was there too.
Flashback: 2003, Dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen.
'Twas the summer before university. Met the boy on my dragon boat team. Long story short, I talked to him EVERY night until 3am. When school started I would drive 40 minutes one way every weekend to see him or I would drive 40 out of my way to pick him up so we could go back to Toronto together. We hung out one on one, a LOT. In essence I was his pseudo girlfriend.
As our "friendship" progressively moved beyond "just friends" without any definition of the relationship I got impatient, confronted him, and received a "Let's just be friends" in return. (Don't do this either. If he doesn't have enough chutzpah to define the relationship, he's not worth your time.)
I spent a day and a half bawling at a friend's place before I could drive back to Guelph safely. Then I spent the next three months crying myself to sleep every night. Was that TMI?
Moral of the story?
Don't be a pseudo girlfriend.
i.e. Don't spend so much one on one time hanging out with a guy hoping he'd eventually ask you out.
Why?
Because it's dumb. Yeah, you heard me dumb. Harsh, but true, but it's tough love.
Why would anyone pay for something he already has?
In other words why would he take the risk to ask you out and commit to you when he already has unlimited access to your time, thoughts, company, and person? Because by being his pseudo girlfriend, you're giving him ALL of that without any need for commitment in return. SCORE! For him at least. Not so much for you.
Because in doing so you have just shot yourself in the foot, not once, not twice, but thrice. Assuming the goal is to enter into a meaningful relationship that has the potential to lead to marriage...
First Shot: You have now taken away any incentive for him to ask you out.
Second Shot: It now seems to other guys that you're totally into this dude so you've taken away any incentive for them to ask you out.
Third and Final Shot: You're wasting your time on a guy and a relationship that's not going anywhere.
So I know it's tempting when you like a guy friend, to spend every possible waking moment in his presence, hanging on to his every word, and etc...but DON'T DO IT. Whatever the reason you think it is for him not asking you out, you're probably over-analyzing. Don't hang on to it, and don't be a pseudo girlfriend. 'Tis not worth it.
Go read: Girl's Guide to Marrying Well
This is my second plug. It's THAT good.
Gentlemen, here's a link to your guide.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Five Good Things (That I'm Looking Forward To)
1. Girls' day out.
Kayaking up north with J.C. at her cottage.
2. Drive in movies.
Two for the price of 1/2 of one. Uber cheap.
3. Girls' night out with my brown girls and brown food.
Good friends, good food, and Shakespeare. It doesn't get any better than this people. Does not get any better than this.
4. The Hinzelque.
One of my favourite events of the year. Hello monster ball!
5. The beach.
Guess where I'm going on my day off?
Kayaking up north with J.C. at her cottage.
2. Drive in movies.
Two for the price of 1/2 of one. Uber cheap.
3. Girls' night out with my brown girls and brown food.
Good friends, good food, and Shakespeare. It doesn't get any better than this people. Does not get any better than this.
4. The Hinzelque.
One of my favourite events of the year. Hello monster ball!
5. The beach.
Guess where I'm going on my day off?
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
How Not to Marry a Jerk
Frustrating.
That is the one word I would use to describe the process of trying to get married. It's like trying to navigate a mine field. There is no map. There is no trail. Just a lot of confusion, emotions, and awkward moments. Thankfully, oh so thankfully and to my relief, there is a sovereign God, wise mentors, and Boundless' mini mag on how to marry well. In its intro, Candice Watters writes:
Most women hope to marry, but for many, it's not happening like they thought it would. It seems too far away, or too unlikely, given the men they know and those they're meeting. Some wonder if their standards are too high. Others suspect all the good men are already taken.
I can totally relate to this, and a whole slew of other worries.
Written for young women, it covers topics from how to be intentional about getting married to purity, involving Christian community in your selection of a mate, and what it means to be compatible in a Biblical sense. Young men would still definitely get something out of it too. It's Biblical, practical, and easy to read. Highly recommended. Two thumbs. Up.
That is the one word I would use to describe the process of trying to get married. It's like trying to navigate a mine field. There is no map. There is no trail. Just a lot of confusion, emotions, and awkward moments. Thankfully, oh so thankfully and to my relief, there is a sovereign God, wise mentors, and Boundless' mini mag on how to marry well. In its intro, Candice Watters writes:
Most women hope to marry, but for many, it's not happening like they thought it would. It seems too far away, or too unlikely, given the men they know and those they're meeting. Some wonder if their standards are too high. Others suspect all the good men are already taken.
I can totally relate to this, and a whole slew of other worries.
Written for young women, it covers topics from how to be intentional about getting married to purity, involving Christian community in your selection of a mate, and what it means to be compatible in a Biblical sense. Young men would still definitely get something out of it too. It's Biblical, practical, and easy to read. Highly recommended. Two thumbs. Up.
Monday, August 17, 2009
First Dance
As a wannabe wedding photographer, weddings are always on my mind.
THIS would be such a good first dance song....except for the fact that it's in mandarin and the lyrics. He's talking about breaking up. But! Oh the melody and his voice. (He's Christian too!!!) There are rare times when I'd want to marry Asian. This is one of them.
THIS would be such a good first dance song....except for the fact that it's in mandarin and the lyrics. He's talking about breaking up. But! Oh the melody and his voice. (He's Christian too!!!) There are rare times when I'd want to marry Asian. This is one of them.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
The Sillies a.k.a. The Pets
Reason for moniker: They all do incredibly silly things.
Silly #1: Duchess
Family: Felis Domestica
Silly #2: Sesame
Family: Canis Familliaris
Silly #3: Sugar a.k.a. The Dumb Blonde
Family: Canis Familliaris
Silly #1: Duchess
Family: Felis Domestica
Silly #2: Sesame
Family: Canis Familliaris
Silly #3: Sugar a.k.a. The Dumb Blonde
Family: Canis Familliaris
Saturday, August 15, 2009
How to Have The Perfect Day
Step 1) Have all previous plans cancel.
Step 2) Sleep in.
Step 3) Wake up when body needs to.
Step 4) Piddle around the house leisurely until ready to go.
Step 5) Drive to favourite university town, at top speed whilst blasting teeny bopper pop music.
Step 6) Get to said town.
Step 7) Stop and eat brunch at favourite local breakfast joint.
Step 8) Go to nearby breathtaking conservation area.
Step 9) Find a shady area and take a nice looooooong nap, or what feels like one anyways.
Step 10) Go Kayaking. Nothing like the sound of paddles gliding through water to relax you.
Step 11) Float/swim around in lake enjoying the icy cool water while getting a nice tan at the same time.
Step 12) Hike to a lookout point where you can see most of the conservation area.
Step 13) Pray and have quiet time at said lookout point.
Step 14) Take pictures of said lookout point.
Step 15) Buy favourite pens from local arts store.
Step 16) Drive through town reminiscing about the good 'ol days.
Step 17) Stop by McDonald's for favourite snack: Hamburgers and a large Nestea for cheap.
Step 18) Lounge on the green in front of your alma mater's most well known building.
Step 19) Have a photoshoot of said alma mater
Step 20) Drive home to cheesy chinese pop music.
Step 21) Shower, relax, and watch cheesy chick flick.
Step 22) Blog about said day.
Step 2) Sleep in.
Step 3) Wake up when body needs to.
Step 4) Piddle around the house leisurely until ready to go.
Step 5) Drive to favourite university town, at top speed whilst blasting teeny bopper pop music.
Step 6) Get to said town.
Step 7) Stop and eat brunch at favourite local breakfast joint.
Step 8) Go to nearby breathtaking conservation area.
Step 9) Find a shady area and take a nice looooooong nap, or what feels like one anyways.
Step 10) Go Kayaking. Nothing like the sound of paddles gliding through water to relax you.
Step 11) Float/swim around in lake enjoying the icy cool water while getting a nice tan at the same time.
Step 12) Hike to a lookout point where you can see most of the conservation area.
Step 13) Pray and have quiet time at said lookout point.
Step 14) Take pictures of said lookout point.
Step 15) Buy favourite pens from local arts store.
Step 16) Drive through town reminiscing about the good 'ol days.
Step 17) Stop by McDonald's for favourite snack: Hamburgers and a large Nestea for cheap.
Step 18) Lounge on the green in front of your alma mater's most well known building.
Step 19) Have a photoshoot of said alma mater
Step 20) Drive home to cheesy chinese pop music.
Step 21) Shower, relax, and watch cheesy chick flick.
Step 22) Blog about said day.
Friday, August 07, 2009
Sometimes It's Like This
I don't want to be pitied.
Nor do I want to be placated.
And I definitely don't want to be patronized.
All's I'm saying is that sometimes it's like this:
Nor do I want to be placated.
And I definitely don't want to be patronized.
All's I'm saying is that sometimes it's like this:
Tuesday, August 04, 2009
What Time Is It?
It's TOOL time!
Anyone get the reference? It's from Home Improvement.
There are days when I feel like a complete and total tool, and today is one of those days. I've been doing some work in preparing for Orientation week at Ryerson for Campus for Christ in the past day or so, and I think I've hit the proverbial PANIC!!! button multiple times already. (Hangs head in shame.) Just when I thought I've mellowed and matured, I go and spazz out.
It's my first major responsibility since burning out, and the self- imposed Asian pressure to perform is holding a knife to my throat. I feel the need to perform and to perform well to prove my worth to myself, to my team, to my supporters, and to my organization, that I'm worthy of being on staff and that I'm not a dead weight because there have been days this past year where I've wondered if Power to Change would get more bang out of their buck if they hired someone else. Someone smarter, healthier, wiser, with more capacity, with more skills, who knows more languages, loves God more, knows the Bible better, is more faithful, etc...because you know there's plenty of people out there that fit into those categories. Now I feel the need to go talk to my shrink. Heh. :P
And ladies and gentlemen that is one of the biggest lies I've ever swallowed.
Because before God I am called to this ministry, and He has approved me, warts and all. And that is all that matters.
Because it's not about me.
It's not about me proving my worth the first week back to school.
It's about God and making His name known on campus.
It's not about me bemoaning my weaknesses.
It's about God and making His strength known through my weaknesses.
It's not even about having the picture perfect plans.
It's about trusting in Him and His sovereignty, and walking in faith.
Now I just need to play that over, and over, and over, and over, and over in my head.
So today's one of those "tool days", but they're good when I have the right perspective; a small view of me and a big view of God.
Anyone get the reference? It's from Home Improvement.
There are days when I feel like a complete and total tool, and today is one of those days. I've been doing some work in preparing for Orientation week at Ryerson for Campus for Christ in the past day or so, and I think I've hit the proverbial PANIC!!! button multiple times already. (Hangs head in shame.) Just when I thought I've mellowed and matured, I go and spazz out.
It's my first major responsibility since burning out, and the self- imposed Asian pressure to perform is holding a knife to my throat. I feel the need to perform and to perform well to prove my worth to myself, to my team, to my supporters, and to my organization, that I'm worthy of being on staff and that I'm not a dead weight because there have been days this past year where I've wondered if Power to Change would get more bang out of their buck if they hired someone else. Someone smarter, healthier, wiser, with more capacity, with more skills, who knows more languages, loves God more, knows the Bible better, is more faithful, etc...because you know there's plenty of people out there that fit into those categories. Now I feel the need to go talk to my shrink. Heh. :P
And ladies and gentlemen that is one of the biggest lies I've ever swallowed.
Because before God I am called to this ministry, and He has approved me, warts and all. And that is all that matters.
Because it's not about me.
It's not about me proving my worth the first week back to school.
It's about God and making His name known on campus.
It's not about me bemoaning my weaknesses.
It's about God and making His strength known through my weaknesses.
It's not even about having the picture perfect plans.
It's about trusting in Him and His sovereignty, and walking in faith.
Now I just need to play that over, and over, and over, and over, and over in my head.
So today's one of those "tool days", but they're good when I have the right perspective; a small view of me and a big view of God.
Monday, August 03, 2009
An Irrational "Love"
Ok, so here I am typing away at three in the morning because I woke up to go to the bathroom, and then started thinking about my CAR- about how much I'm going to miss it, about how you know, if I didn't sell it; I could spontaneously decide to go to the beach, and be able to do it, or if I REALLY wanted to, I could go to Guelph and Hamilton or anywhere else at anytime I want, about how much closer the Kenyons and swing dancing are.........and on and on to the point where my heart felt really wrenched.
Wrenched just exactly like the way it pained and writhed in your chest when you found out that the current crush of your life likes someone else/doesn't like someone with characteristics like you/doesn't like your race/just started dating someone... not you, DUH!/hates YOUR guts/has been promised to the prince/princess of Somewhereville at birth to end 200 centuries of war between...oops wrong story/insert another reason in which said crush will never go out with you.
YES! It really feels like this. I can understand guys' attachments to their cars now. WHY?!?!
"STELLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"*
*In case you're wondering, this is not the name of my car...although it could work, but what's the point of naming her when I have to give her up in a few days. It's adding fuel to the fire. That said, it's a reference to A Streetcar Named Desire. You know, just to show off my intelligence in my irrational state.
Ok, back to bed, and dreams of......crushes who were promised to the princess of Somewhereville at birth to end 200 centuries of war between- I mean, grapes. Dreams of grape.
Wrenched just exactly like the way it pained and writhed in your chest when you found out that the current crush of your life likes someone else/doesn't like someone with characteristics like you/doesn't like your race/just started dating someone... not you, DUH!/hates YOUR guts/has been promised to the prince/princess of Somewhereville at birth to end 200 centuries of war between...oops wrong story/insert another reason in which said crush will never go out with you.
YES! It really feels like this. I can understand guys' attachments to their cars now. WHY?!?!
"STELLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"*
*In case you're wondering, this is not the name of my car...although it could work, but what's the point of naming her when I have to give her up in a few days. It's adding fuel to the fire. That said, it's a reference to A Streetcar Named Desire. You know, just to show off my intelligence in my irrational state.
Ok, back to bed, and dreams of......crushes who were promised to the princess of Somewhereville at birth to end 200 centuries of war between- I mean, grapes. Dreams of grape.
Sunday, August 02, 2009
Toronto Times
Things I'm looking forward to doing once I'm back in the T.O.
1. Swing Dance.
This goes without saying, but there, I said it.
2. Strolling through Queen St. West on a sunny day.
And included in this of course is hitting up the White Squirrel and Tealish.
3. Exploring the Annex with my awesome sidekick, JD the camera, and mini Redd.
4. Chilling out at Ashbridges Bay.
Mayhaps a game of beach volleyball?
5. Hitting up Balzac's at the Distillery district.
6. The Tempest at High Park
7. Paint
1. Swing Dance.
This goes without saying, but there, I said it.
2. Strolling through Queen St. West on a sunny day.
And included in this of course is hitting up the White Squirrel and Tealish.
3. Exploring the Annex with my awesome sidekick, JD the camera, and mini Redd.
4. Chilling out at Ashbridges Bay.
Mayhaps a game of beach volleyball?
5. Hitting up Balzac's at the Distillery district.
6. The Tempest at High Park
7. Paint
Saturday, August 01, 2009
Five Good Things [California Edition]
1. Wasabi
My favourite Japanese restaurant on this continent. (Thus far.)
2. The West Coast highway
We're doing it again this year with bigger and better cameras.
3. Sesame and Sugar
My silly dogs.
4. Duchess
My fat cat who sleeps in the sink.
5. The best for the last. My parental unit.
My favourite Japanese restaurant on this continent. (Thus far.)
2. The West Coast highway
We're doing it again this year with bigger and better cameras.
3. Sesame and Sugar
My silly dogs.
4. Duchess
My fat cat who sleeps in the sink.
5. The best for the last. My parental unit.
Hermit
After six weeks of carousing with loads of fun people, living an hour by hour schedule it's good to hole myself up in my parental units' home and veg. The introvert in me is jumping up and down, doing cartwheels, waving flags and blowing on whistles at the prospect of a week of silence and solitude. W00T!!!
Saturday, July 25, 2009
This Much and No More
I love how my body knows its limits when I mentally don't. I didn't realize I was pushing myself too hard this week until I came down sick with a cold. Then it was like my body saying to me, "Ok, you're pushing me too hard, so I'm going to slow down...now whether you like it or not."
The immune system has been pretty depressed since burning out. I usually don't get sick at all during the year even when it's flu season, but the last twelve months I've racked up two bouts of bronchitis, two colds, and one sinus infection. A record, I think. All that's missing is a fever.
It's still minor, so here's to hoping it doesn't develop into bronchitis or a sinus infection. Fingers crossed.
The immune system has been pretty depressed since burning out. I usually don't get sick at all during the year even when it's flu season, but the last twelve months I've racked up two bouts of bronchitis, two colds, and one sinus infection. A record, I think. All that's missing is a fever.
It's still minor, so here's to hoping it doesn't develop into bronchitis or a sinus infection. Fingers crossed.
Just a Moment of Weakness
I use to get delighted when people would ask me if I had any insecurities because to me it meant that I was successful in presenting to the world a strong image. You know the whole, "I am woman, hear me roar" kind of thing.
Any loneliness, insecurity, or fears that I had would just be a moment of weakness. In my head I was independent and INVINCIBLE.
That was why going through burnout was so frustrating because it revealed the truth that I was not independent and invincible. In fact it was quite the opposite. I'm quite dependent on the mercies of God for every little thing, the truth of which did not bode well with me during the past few months. Because even though I was dependent on Jesus for my salvation I wanted to be able to say that I could depend on myself for being able to take care of myself physically, emotionally, mentally. I mean it's everyday life, I should be able to handle it! What a subtle but insidious mentality. My worth was in again...how I performed. Darn the performance trap. I shake my fist at it!
I thought I had learned this lesson well this past year, but as I am recovering, it seems the pride comes back just as fast as the energy levels. Sigh.
I was shocked to discover that in the past week I was mentally brushing insecurities, anxieties, and the like off as "just a moment of weakness". I still had this "I am invincible" mentality. Argrgggggh.
Any loneliness, insecurity, or fears that I had would just be a moment of weakness. In my head I was independent and INVINCIBLE.
That was why going through burnout was so frustrating because it revealed the truth that I was not independent and invincible. In fact it was quite the opposite. I'm quite dependent on the mercies of God for every little thing, the truth of which did not bode well with me during the past few months. Because even though I was dependent on Jesus for my salvation I wanted to be able to say that I could depend on myself for being able to take care of myself physically, emotionally, mentally. I mean it's everyday life, I should be able to handle it! What a subtle but insidious mentality. My worth was in again...how I performed. Darn the performance trap. I shake my fist at it!
I thought I had learned this lesson well this past year, but as I am recovering, it seems the pride comes back just as fast as the energy levels. Sigh.
I was shocked to discover that in the past week I was mentally brushing insecurities, anxieties, and the like off as "just a moment of weakness". I still had this "I am invincible" mentality. Argrgggggh.
Friday, July 24, 2009
The Summer of the Bucket List
One of the (minor) reasons that I love my job is that every summer I get to check things off my bucket list.
Things I checked off this summer:
1. Whitewater rafting in Colorado
2. Learn to drive standard
3. Road trip the western part of the U.S.A.
4. Visit Yellowstone and see Old Faithful
Things I checked off this summer:
1. Whitewater rafting in Colorado
2. Learn to drive standard
3. Road trip the western part of the U.S.A.
4. Visit Yellowstone and see Old Faithful
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Life Hurts
Today two of my best friends and I got together for a little coffee date.
All three of us have been through some very trying times in the past two years, circumstances made even harder by the fact that we were far apart in distance.
We laughed, we reminisced, we shared, we praised, and we almost cried or at least I almost did.
"Life hurts," was A.'s response to my fears and anxiety of relapsing into burnout. And how true that statement was and is.
Even after going through burnout I still go around thinking that pain is abnormal and that I need to avoid it. I also have this mentality that I've had my share of crap in life as a kid so I should be exempt for the next few decades.
But the truth of the matter is, that I live in a fallen, imperfect world with other fallen, imperfect people, and sooner or later life's going to hurt. It's the norm not the exception, but I keep forgetting this, and keep going around trying to protect myself with walls a zillion feet high as if I could really avoid pain forever that way. Silly me.
But I think the saddest part is that I forget my Lord and Master, who promises that:
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;
when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,
and the flame shall not consume you.
For I am the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.
Isaiah 43:2-3
Life hurts, but He gets me through.
All three of us have been through some very trying times in the past two years, circumstances made even harder by the fact that we were far apart in distance.
We laughed, we reminisced, we shared, we praised, and we almost cried or at least I almost did.
"Life hurts," was A.'s response to my fears and anxiety of relapsing into burnout. And how true that statement was and is.
Even after going through burnout I still go around thinking that pain is abnormal and that I need to avoid it. I also have this mentality that I've had my share of crap in life as a kid so I should be exempt for the next few decades.
But the truth of the matter is, that I live in a fallen, imperfect world with other fallen, imperfect people, and sooner or later life's going to hurt. It's the norm not the exception, but I keep forgetting this, and keep going around trying to protect myself with walls a zillion feet high as if I could really avoid pain forever that way. Silly me.
But I think the saddest part is that I forget my Lord and Master, who promises that:
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;
when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,
and the flame shall not consume you.
For I am the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.
Isaiah 43:2-3
Life hurts, but He gets me through.
Monday, July 20, 2009
Five Good Things Road Trip Edition
1. Hot Showers
2. No Mosquitos
3. A REAL bed
4. Not freezing in the morning
5. iHOP
C. and I have just returned from the middle of nowhere, to civilization. Can you tell? We're almost back in the motherland but not quite. Abby in a few.
2. No Mosquitos
3. A REAL bed
4. Not freezing in the morning
5. iHOP
C. and I have just returned from the middle of nowhere, to civilization. Can you tell? We're almost back in the motherland but not quite. Abby in a few.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Driving Standard
So C. been teaching me to drive standard for our road trip back to the great white north.
I now know the fear of "stalling".
Yesterday was my first time on the streets, and of course I stalled at an intersection. Not an incredibly busy one, but an intersection nevertheless. I stalled at the very least... SEVEN times. I got so flustered, especially after the first few times some idiot started wailing on his horn at me. Like wailed without a break. I mean can't you see that I'm having trouble already without you making me even more panicky?
I checked my rearview mirror for him, but he wasn't behind me so I didn't understand what the rush was. In any case he could always go around me. The only other vehicle at the intersection was a moped, but it didn't seem capable of such a loud and continuous honk so I was like "What the heck?! Where is this guy, and why is he honking so hard at me?"
It was then that C. told me:
"Shelly, you need to stop leaning on the horn."
I now know the fear of "stalling".
Yesterday was my first time on the streets, and of course I stalled at an intersection. Not an incredibly busy one, but an intersection nevertheless. I stalled at the very least... SEVEN times. I got so flustered, especially after the first few times some idiot started wailing on his horn at me. Like wailed without a break. I mean can't you see that I'm having trouble already without you making me even more panicky?
I checked my rearview mirror for him, but he wasn't behind me so I didn't understand what the rush was. In any case he could always go around me. The only other vehicle at the intersection was a moped, but it didn't seem capable of such a loud and continuous honk so I was like "What the heck?! Where is this guy, and why is he honking so hard at me?"
It was then that C. told me:
"Shelly, you need to stop leaning on the horn."
Enough Already
The very act of posting this may negate what I have to say.
I'm really tired of discussing romantic relationships, engagements, marriage, anything that falls into that sphere. Not because I'm cynical, bitter, jealous, but because I'm just...BORED. Yet it never seems to stop. It always comes up. I ALWAYS bring it up. It's always on the back burner. It's like the default topic.
What is it about this topic? You can never get away from it.
Resigned.
I'm really tired of discussing romantic relationships, engagements, marriage, anything that falls into that sphere. Not because I'm cynical, bitter, jealous, but because I'm just...BORED. Yet it never seems to stop. It always comes up. I ALWAYS bring it up. It's always on the back burner. It's like the default topic.
What is it about this topic? You can never get away from it.
Resigned.
I Miss...
1. My sunny apartment
2. Grace Toronto
3. Grace Toronto friends
4. Toronto swing scene
5. And yes...the TTC
2. Grace Toronto
3. Grace Toronto friends
4. Toronto swing scene
5. And yes...the TTC
Monday, July 13, 2009
On Responsibility
Sure, I'm 23...going on to 24.
Sure, I've been on my own since 17.
Sure, I'm bringing in a paycheck being a working girl and all that, but I don't think I'm actually that responsible.
Responsibility, I have recently realized isn't defined by past accomplishments or age, but it's determined by my present actions. SURPRISE SURPRISE! REVELATION! SOMEONE GIVE ME A PRIZE!
It's weird because I've always thought of myself as pretty responsible, but there are definitely areas which has recently been brought to my attention where I have been irresponsible. Work commitments, church commitments, finances, and just even being on time. Funnily enough, watching Confessions of a Shopaholic was convicting. I think I've actually regressed in responsibility.
But how to become more responsible and less stressed? The obvious answer? Take on less stuff because if I were to be fully committed and responsible for everything on my plate I'd go nutso AGAIN. Ah, but what a blow to my prideful and misguided "anything you can do, I can do better" mentality. I have to remember that I am not the saviour of the world, that position is filled already.
Sure, I've been on my own since 17.
Sure, I'm bringing in a paycheck being a working girl and all that, but I don't think I'm actually that responsible.
Responsibility, I have recently realized isn't defined by past accomplishments or age, but it's determined by my present actions. SURPRISE SURPRISE! REVELATION! SOMEONE GIVE ME A PRIZE!
It's weird because I've always thought of myself as pretty responsible, but there are definitely areas which has recently been brought to my attention where I have been irresponsible. Work commitments, church commitments, finances, and just even being on time. Funnily enough, watching Confessions of a Shopaholic was convicting. I think I've actually regressed in responsibility.
But how to become more responsible and less stressed? The obvious answer? Take on less stuff because if I were to be fully committed and responsible for everything on my plate I'd go nutso AGAIN. Ah, but what a blow to my prideful and misguided "anything you can do, I can do better" mentality. I have to remember that I am not the saviour of the world, that position is filled already.
Five Good Things
1. Love Story by Taylor Swift
2. White Blueberry Blossom Lemonade
3. Bang!
4. Jasmine Scented Candles
5. Waterfalls
2. White Blueberry Blossom Lemonade
3. Bang!
4. Jasmine Scented Candles
5. Waterfalls
Friday, July 10, 2009
On Being "Crazy"*
One of the hardest things about burnout is there is no visible manifestation like there would be, say if I was suffering from a broken arm. With a broken arm you can judge accurately when I am finally healed, but with burnout things are not what they seem. Outwardly I might look perfectly fine, but inwardly, it could be a completely different story. Though I have been recuperating, the road to recovery has been an interesting one to navigate as I try to figure out my limits and boundaries for when I'm not "crazy" or at least, for becoming less "crazy".
With the return of the light in my eyes and joy in my smile, comes the fear of others' expectations. "Oh you LOOK fine now! Great! Now you can do this, this, and THIS." The inability to say no because of people- pleasing tendencies, and the failure to watch my boundaries was one of the many reasons I got into this mess in the first place, and being at IBS, taking grad level courses has brought me face to face with the demon of the approval of others'.
The first two weeks bowled me over, and as I approached the "second semester" I considered dropping a class. I was not getting enough sleep and stressed, yet it was interesting to see the thoughts that went through my head as I tried to determine whether or not I would drop the course.
What if my friends thought I was slacking off?
What if my director thought I was slacking off? Am I copping out? Can't I just suck it up and stick it out?
And 'round and 'round it went until finally the question:
Before God: Are you slacking off or can you really not handle a fourth course?
That decided it. I knew I couldn't go into the new school year wearied, but it's been hard because there's no visible indication that I'm not well. The only one is that I've been taking four hour naps to recupe the lost sleep from the past two weeks, and even that can be taken as "slacking off".
It was easy to say no at the nadir of my burnout because...really there was no other option, AND I was under direction from my doctors to say so. I had PERMISSION. There was freedom in saying no because I had a reason. Sorry, going crazy. Can't do it.
But now I'm faced with the expectations of recovery and the kindly suspicion of using burnout as a mental crutch. Since I look fine outwardly, some people automatically think there's other reasons for my fatigue. I don't feel the freedom to say no anymore because I think that I don't have a reason to, AND this is where another part of me goes HOW ABOUT LONG TERM SANITY? HOW'S THAT FOR A REASON?
Even this post in itself is me trying to justify myself and my lack of productivity to the world. Ugh.
To Be Continued...
* Please note all use of the word "crazy" to refer to burnout is facetious. Burnout is serious. I'm just making fun of the stereotype.
With the return of the light in my eyes and joy in my smile, comes the fear of others' expectations. "Oh you LOOK fine now! Great! Now you can do this, this, and THIS." The inability to say no because of people- pleasing tendencies, and the failure to watch my boundaries was one of the many reasons I got into this mess in the first place, and being at IBS, taking grad level courses has brought me face to face with the demon of the approval of others'.
The first two weeks bowled me over, and as I approached the "second semester" I considered dropping a class. I was not getting enough sleep and stressed, yet it was interesting to see the thoughts that went through my head as I tried to determine whether or not I would drop the course.
What if my friends thought I was slacking off?
What if my director thought I was slacking off? Am I copping out? Can't I just suck it up and stick it out?
And 'round and 'round it went until finally the question:
Before God: Are you slacking off or can you really not handle a fourth course?
That decided it. I knew I couldn't go into the new school year wearied, but it's been hard because there's no visible indication that I'm not well. The only one is that I've been taking four hour naps to recupe the lost sleep from the past two weeks, and even that can be taken as "slacking off".
It was easy to say no at the nadir of my burnout because...really there was no other option, AND I was under direction from my doctors to say so. I had PERMISSION. There was freedom in saying no because I had a reason. Sorry, going crazy. Can't do it.
But now I'm faced with the expectations of recovery and the kindly suspicion of using burnout as a mental crutch. Since I look fine outwardly, some people automatically think there's other reasons for my fatigue. I don't feel the freedom to say no anymore because I think that I don't have a reason to, AND this is where another part of me goes HOW ABOUT LONG TERM SANITY? HOW'S THAT FOR A REASON?
Even this post in itself is me trying to justify myself and my lack of productivity to the world. Ugh.
To Be Continued...
* Please note all use of the word "crazy" to refer to burnout is facetious. Burnout is serious. I'm just making fun of the stereotype.
Monday, July 06, 2009
On Balance
This weekend was a hiking, photo-shooting, elk-eating, fireworks watching, white-water rafting, and a bit of studying sort of weekend.
[As I type this J.S., is annoyingly reading over my shoulder correcting every word, in other words, backseat blogging. Good thing he doesn't read my blog otherwise I'll always get comments on my grammar. Well now I think he's going to go try to find this sucker, and make said comments.]
Anyways I digress.
This is all to say that this weekend has been a "good for my soul" type of weekend. It was busy, yes, but it was the type of weekend that prepares you to face the new week rested, refreshed, and rejuvenated, ready to chomp at whatever life throws at you. RAWR. It was just the type of weekend that I needed.
Being thrown back into a busy, scholarly lifestyle, made it easy to go right back to living a very imbalanced lifestyle. I was once again caught up and swept along by the currents and demands of the circumstances of life. Go to class, study, eat, sleep, play. Before I knew it I was getting overwhelmed, and stressed again, feeling swept along by the waves of life. I didn't even notice that something was up until my mood dipped and I got the feeling of clinging on for dear life again. So I decided to slow 'er down for the sake of my long term sanity. I'll thank myself later.
[As I type this J.S., is annoyingly reading over my shoulder correcting every word, in other words, backseat blogging. Good thing he doesn't read my blog otherwise I'll always get comments on my grammar. Well now I think he's going to go try to find this sucker, and make said comments.]
Anyways I digress.
This is all to say that this weekend has been a "good for my soul" type of weekend. It was busy, yes, but it was the type of weekend that prepares you to face the new week rested, refreshed, and rejuvenated, ready to chomp at whatever life throws at you. RAWR. It was just the type of weekend that I needed.
Being thrown back into a busy, scholarly lifestyle, made it easy to go right back to living a very imbalanced lifestyle. I was once again caught up and swept along by the currents and demands of the circumstances of life. Go to class, study, eat, sleep, play. Before I knew it I was getting overwhelmed, and stressed again, feeling swept along by the waves of life. I didn't even notice that something was up until my mood dipped and I got the feeling of clinging on for dear life again. So I decided to slow 'er down for the sake of my long term sanity. I'll thank myself later.
Thursday, July 02, 2009
Trash the Dress
So back in May, I had a chance to do a Trash the Dress Shoot. I'm only just starting post-production.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Five Good Things Colorado Edition
1. Living in the same apartment as my BFF even though I still message her on gchat, to which her reply is "DORKFACE".
2. Learning about God despite the massive amounts of homework.
3. All the fast food joints that we don't have in Canada.
4. Southern drawls.
5. Seeing and hanging out with Canadian staff for an extended period of time.
2. Learning about God despite the massive amounts of homework.
3. All the fast food joints that we don't have in Canada.
4. Southern drawls.
5. Seeing and hanging out with Canadian staff for an extended period of time.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
A Pleasant Surprise
I've had quite a few number of unpleasant surprises from life this summer, so it was nice to have a nice, unplanned, pleasant surprise for once. I hadn't booked my flight to Vancouver due to laziness, but when I found out in Colorado that my friend, C.C. needed a roadtrip buddy to staff conference, I jumped at the chance. So after IBS, I'll be road-tripping it up to Vancouver for staff training and staff conference with C.C.
It's tickling me pink. I've always wanted to road-trip across the U.S., but more specifically the western half because it's different than what I'm usually used to. So another childhood dream is going to be checked off. And as a result of C.C. having a standard car, I am now learning to drive standard. SCORE!
It's tickling me pink. I've always wanted to road-trip across the U.S., but more specifically the western half because it's different than what I'm usually used to. So another childhood dream is going to be checked off. And as a result of C.C. having a standard car, I am now learning to drive standard. SCORE!
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Fa-Fa-Fa-Family
For family, I would export myself to the states.
Visiting my family is like stepping into a pool of warm sunshine from the coolness of solitude.
The Fives (Family Edition)
I love...
1a. Hearing the "baby, sugar, honey, sweetie," and all those terms of endearments that my dear aunties use.
1b. Trying to learn grace, gentleness, and sweetness from observing my beautiful aunties.
1c. Basking in the unconditional, selfless love of my mummy dearest.
2. Teasing and joking with my uncles; saying that I need to get my assisting the elderly badge by helping them; trash talking over Ticket to Ride games; asking them questions about boys.
3. Giggling over a yearbook behind closed doors with my little cousin D. as he shows me the girls he has crushes on.
4. Having Starbucks and Bookstore dates with my cousin J. We're two peas in a pod.
5. The feel of N.'s head on my shoulder when I carry her around when she's pooped out.
All this in the desert beauty of Arizona. Ahh...
For family, I would export myself to the states...were it not for the conviction of my calling specifically to Toronto with Campus for Christ, and the inspiring vision of Grace Toronto. Were it not for that, I would be giving my one year's notice, and requesting a transfer to the South.
Visiting my family is like stepping into a pool of warm sunshine from the coolness of solitude.
The Fives (Family Edition)
I love...
1a. Hearing the "baby, sugar, honey, sweetie," and all those terms of endearments that my dear aunties use.
1b. Trying to learn grace, gentleness, and sweetness from observing my beautiful aunties.
1c. Basking in the unconditional, selfless love of my mummy dearest.
2. Teasing and joking with my uncles; saying that I need to get my assisting the elderly badge by helping them; trash talking over Ticket to Ride games; asking them questions about boys.
3. Giggling over a yearbook behind closed doors with my little cousin D. as he shows me the girls he has crushes on.
4. Having Starbucks and Bookstore dates with my cousin J. We're two peas in a pod.
5. The feel of N.'s head on my shoulder when I carry her around when she's pooped out.
All this in the desert beauty of Arizona. Ahh...
For family, I would export myself to the states...were it not for the conviction of my calling specifically to Toronto with Campus for Christ, and the inspiring vision of Grace Toronto. Were it not for that, I would be giving my one year's notice, and requesting a transfer to the South.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Not "Either, Or", but "AND"
Single and content, yet desirous for marriage.
Seems like an oxymoron doesn't it? It used to seem to me like you have to hate one status in order to like the other. I use to villainize 'marriage' in my mind to hang on to what shred of contentment I had with being single, which is, in all honesty; no contentment at all. Or I'd swing the pendulum the other way and scorn singleness. Oh the folly of youth.
But it wasn't just me. It seems like a lot of people think like that too. It's not blatant. No one goes around with a bullhorn announcing: "You gotta hate being single if you want to get married or you have to hate marriage in order to enjoy being single." It's very subtle.
Like the question, "You have the gift of celibacy?" after I stated with conviction that I very much enjoy my single status. Seriously?
For the record, I don't think I have the gift of celibacy. I very much agree with my friend, M who says "You know you have 'the gift' when you're on your death bed and you've never been married."
But I digress. It's gotten to the point that I'm a bit hesitant to voice my desires for marriage or my desire for companionship for fear that I'm going to be misconstrued as being desperate and hating singleness, which in case you haven't figured out yet, I'm NOT. Recently at the hint of some of my desire for companionship, the outpouring of pity begins for the supposed plight that is 'singleness'. I might be oversensitive, but...
It is so very much possible to thoroughly enjoy and savour the season of singleness while desiring marriage at the same time. So this is my public service announcement stating thus:
I. ENJOY. BEING. SINGLE.
I like being able to do things at the drop of a time like going off to a swing dancing weekend with two days' notice.
I like staying out late without having to worry about someone needing me to come back home.
I like all the time that I have to devote to my hobbies.
I like being able to spend all that time with friends and family.
I like setting my own budget, my own timeline, my own goals.
I like eating whatever, whenever.
I like that I can work stupid, crazy, hours in ministry without anyone minding because campus ministry is definitely not a 9 to 5 job.
I like sprawling all over queen size beds when I get to hotels.
I like being in the driver seat every time I get into my car.
I like that I can buy stuff without consulting someone.
I like that I don't really need to think about anybody else except for me. I'm selfish.
I like ALL that FREEDOM.
At the same time...
I. WANT. TO. GET. MARRIED. SOMEDAY.
I want to be able to serve my husband, and cook yummy, delicious meals for him, do his laundry, help him find the right clothes, among other things.
I want to be able to come home at night to someone, to belong to someone.
I want to be able to bounce ideas off someone and have someone to go through life with.
I want someone to share my dreams and goals with.
I want someone to pick me up at the airport.
I want someone to freak out with like when I had chest pains and had to go to the ER.
I want someone to hold my hand at the ER.
I want to be that support for that someone, encouraging him to be all that God has created him to be and praying for him.
I want to keep a nice house so that he can return to a nice, homey, relaxed environment.
I want to start a family with someone and start a legacy with him, like Johnny Edwards.
And so much more...
So it's not either be happy with being single or desire to get married, but be happy being single and desire to get married.
Seems like an oxymoron doesn't it? It used to seem to me like you have to hate one status in order to like the other. I use to villainize 'marriage' in my mind to hang on to what shred of contentment I had with being single, which is, in all honesty; no contentment at all. Or I'd swing the pendulum the other way and scorn singleness. Oh the folly of youth.
But it wasn't just me. It seems like a lot of people think like that too. It's not blatant. No one goes around with a bullhorn announcing: "You gotta hate being single if you want to get married or you have to hate marriage in order to enjoy being single." It's very subtle.
Like the question, "You have the gift of celibacy?" after I stated with conviction that I very much enjoy my single status. Seriously?
For the record, I don't think I have the gift of celibacy. I very much agree with my friend, M who says "You know you have 'the gift' when you're on your death bed and you've never been married."
But I digress. It's gotten to the point that I'm a bit hesitant to voice my desires for marriage or my desire for companionship for fear that I'm going to be misconstrued as being desperate and hating singleness, which in case you haven't figured out yet, I'm NOT. Recently at the hint of some of my desire for companionship, the outpouring of pity begins for the supposed plight that is 'singleness'. I might be oversensitive, but...
It is so very much possible to thoroughly enjoy and savour the season of singleness while desiring marriage at the same time. So this is my public service announcement stating thus:
I. ENJOY. BEING. SINGLE.
I like being able to do things at the drop of a time like going off to a swing dancing weekend with two days' notice.
I like staying out late without having to worry about someone needing me to come back home.
I like all the time that I have to devote to my hobbies.
I like being able to spend all that time with friends and family.
I like setting my own budget, my own timeline, my own goals.
I like eating whatever, whenever.
I like that I can work stupid, crazy, hours in ministry without anyone minding because campus ministry is definitely not a 9 to 5 job.
I like sprawling all over queen size beds when I get to hotels.
I like being in the driver seat every time I get into my car.
I like that I can buy stuff without consulting someone.
I like that I don't really need to think about anybody else except for me. I'm selfish.
I like ALL that FREEDOM.
At the same time...
I. WANT. TO. GET. MARRIED. SOMEDAY.
I want to be able to serve my husband, and cook yummy, delicious meals for him, do his laundry, help him find the right clothes, among other things.
I want to be able to come home at night to someone, to belong to someone.
I want to be able to bounce ideas off someone and have someone to go through life with.
I want someone to share my dreams and goals with.
I want someone to pick me up at the airport.
I want someone to freak out with like when I had chest pains and had to go to the ER.
I want someone to hold my hand at the ER.
I want to be that support for that someone, encouraging him to be all that God has created him to be and praying for him.
I want to keep a nice house so that he can return to a nice, homey, relaxed environment.
I want to start a family with someone and start a legacy with him, like Johnny Edwards.
And so much more...
So it's not either be happy with being single or desire to get married, but be happy being single and desire to get married.
Housewifely Ambitions
Things That I Think a Good Housewife Ought to Know How to Make:
(So therefore I ought to learn how to cook.)
1. Cookies from scratch.
2. Full Thanksgiving Dinner from scratch.
*Turkey
*Gravy
*Stuffing
*Sides
3. Lasagna from scratch even the noodles.
4. Spaghetti from scratch meaning...handmade meatballs.
5. Hamburger patties from scratch.
6. Cake from scratch.
7. Steak.
Anyone wanna be a guinea pig?
(So therefore I ought to learn how to cook.)
1. Cookies from scratch.
2. Full Thanksgiving Dinner from scratch.
*Turkey
*Gravy
*Stuffing
*Sides
3. Lasagna from scratch even the noodles.
4. Spaghetti from scratch meaning...handmade meatballs.
5. Hamburger patties from scratch.
6. Cake from scratch.
7. Steak.
Anyone wanna be a guinea pig?
Thursday, June 11, 2009
The Privilege of Packing
It's one thing when you're packing for a 6 week mission trip to a developing country, but it's another when you're packing for an extensive trip to a developed country. The former I could care less how I look, the latter I want to bring my entire closet and shoe collection.
It pains me that I cannot bring that sweet pair of teal kitten heels that will match that one top because....it only matches that one and only that one top. Woe is me.
What a privilege it is to have such a silly dilemma when there are millions around the world languishing for the want of food and water, the basic necessities of life when I can fret about how many pairs of shoes to bring along to a trip.
Then there's the fact that I am even going somewhere on a jet plane. And also the fact that I even have things to pack.
Privileged and blessed by God indeed for I did not do anything to deserve living in this country. I could have easily been one of the underprivileged.
It pains me that I cannot bring that sweet pair of teal kitten heels that will match that one top because....it only matches that one and only that one top. Woe is me.
What a privilege it is to have such a silly dilemma when there are millions around the world languishing for the want of food and water, the basic necessities of life when I can fret about how many pairs of shoes to bring along to a trip.
Then there's the fact that I am even going somewhere on a jet plane. And also the fact that I even have things to pack.
Privileged and blessed by God indeed for I did not do anything to deserve living in this country. I could have easily been one of the underprivileged.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
The Subconscious Speaks
In my dream I'm back in school. It looks like my junior high in New York City. Dark, dingy, and dreary. Like a jail.
It starts off well. I have my books, and I go to class. But quickly, little by little I start skipping and slacking. Then before I know it finals are next week. I haven't attended any lectures, and have completed none of the readings. The knowledge of impending failure is certain, and in my dream I start to panic.
The first time I dreamed this dream, I was cramming at the end. The second time, I completely gave up, and was trying to drop the courses before the course drop deadline.
I think my subconscious is trying to say something, like the fact that maybe just maybe I might be stressed about my IBS readings?
The irony is when I was in university there were definitely some courses where I skipped completely and didn't do any readings until the few days before finals. Yet I never had such dreams.
It starts off well. I have my books, and I go to class. But quickly, little by little I start skipping and slacking. Then before I know it finals are next week. I haven't attended any lectures, and have completed none of the readings. The knowledge of impending failure is certain, and in my dream I start to panic.
The first time I dreamed this dream, I was cramming at the end. The second time, I completely gave up, and was trying to drop the courses before the course drop deadline.
I think my subconscious is trying to say something, like the fact that maybe just maybe I might be stressed about my IBS readings?
The irony is when I was in university there were definitely some courses where I skipped completely and didn't do any readings until the few days before finals. Yet I never had such dreams.
Growing Up
Recently I've had frequent moments where I've actually felt "grown-up". Moments like when I was on the road to vacation with Lydders, or when I spontaneously decided to go to Quebec for the Canadian Swing Dancing Championships, or when I was showing my car to potential buyers, or when my credit card number was stolen. For the most part I usually just feel like a kid with a LOT of freedom, playing at "real" life. But now I'm feeling more like an adult,......................... 0.001% of the time.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
If I Won Lotto 649...
and I had no social/moral obligations, I would:
1) Remove the monstrosity from my foot.
2) Sell my car and buy a baby blue mini cooper.
3) Buy a loft with a lake-shore view, and furnish it with a wanton shopping spree.
4) Pay off my loans.
5) Buy Canon's whole line of lenses, and their top o' line camera.
6) Take my family on a luxury vacation to Greece.
7) Take my best friend on a luxury vacation to Hawaii.
8) Buy my best friend a purple vespa.
[Although according to her, this would be a social and moral obligation.]
9) Put aside a chunk o' money for a possible wedding to goodness knows who.
10) Tour Europe for a year...or two.
11) Take private swing dance lessons EVERY day.
One can always dream.
1) Remove the monstrosity from my foot.
2) Sell my car and buy a baby blue mini cooper.
3) Buy a loft with a lake-shore view, and furnish it with a wanton shopping spree.
4) Pay off my loans.
5) Buy Canon's whole line of lenses, and their top o' line camera.
6) Take my family on a luxury vacation to Greece.
7) Take my best friend on a luxury vacation to Hawaii.
8) Buy my best friend a purple vespa.
[Although according to her, this would be a social and moral obligation.]
9) Put aside a chunk o' money for a possible wedding to goodness knows who.
10) Tour Europe for a year...or two.
11) Take private swing dance lessons EVERY day.
One can always dream.
Friday, May 01, 2009
BBC Book List
Instructions:
1) Look at the list and put an 'x' after those you have read.
2) Add a '' to the ones you LOVE.
3) Star (*) those you plan on reading.
4) Tally your total at the bottom.
1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen (x")
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien(*)
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte (x")
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling (x")
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee (x)
6 The Bible (x")
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte (x)
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens (x)
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott (*)
12 Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller (*)
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare (*)
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien (x")
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger (*)
19 The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger (x")
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell (*)
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald (*)
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy (*)
25 The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy (*)
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis (x")
34 Emma - Jane Austen
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen (*)
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis (x)
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini (x)
38 Captain Corelli's Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden (x)
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown (x)
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery (x")
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood (x)
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding (x)
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan (x)
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel (x)
52 Dune - Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen (*)
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck (*)
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov (*)
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas (*)
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones's Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight's Children - Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville (*)
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett (x)
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses - James Joyce (*)
76 The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray (*)
80 Possession - AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens (x")
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry (x)
87 Charlotte's Web - EB White (x)
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom (x)
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas (x")
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare (x)
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl (x")
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo (*)
27/100
If this was a test I'd failed miserably.
1) Look at the list and put an 'x' after those you have read.
2) Add a '' to the ones you LOVE.
3) Star (*) those you plan on reading.
4) Tally your total at the bottom.
1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen (x")
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien(*)
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte (x")
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling (x")
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee (x)
6 The Bible (x")
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte (x)
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens (x)
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott (*)
12 Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller (*)
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare (*)
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien (x")
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger (*)
19 The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger (x")
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell (*)
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald (*)
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy (*)
25 The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy (*)
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis (x")
34 Emma - Jane Austen
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen (*)
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis (x)
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini (x)
38 Captain Corelli's Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden (x)
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown (x)
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery (x")
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood (x)
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding (x)
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan (x)
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel (x)
52 Dune - Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen (*)
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck (*)
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov (*)
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas (*)
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones's Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight's Children - Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville (*)
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett (x)
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses - James Joyce (*)
76 The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray (*)
80 Possession - AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens (x")
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry (x)
87 Charlotte's Web - EB White (x)
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom (x)
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas (x")
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare (x)
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl (x")
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo (*)
27/100
If this was a test I'd failed miserably.
Monday, April 13, 2009
It's Happened
Remember how when you were a kid and you hated those "aunties" and even some "uncles" who would attack you the minute they saw you? How they would gush about how adorable you were, and how they wanted to eat your cheeks, and pester you incessantly for hugs and kisses? How you vowed never to become one of them because you know from first hand experience how annoying that was? And how you don't want to be constantly kissing the rough surfaces of some random adult's cheek? Yeah, me too.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Artistic Aspirations
I aspire to...
1. Get a Photography Certificate
2. Swing Dance Competitively
3. Rock Out on a real Electric a la Rock Band
1. Get a Photography Certificate
2. Swing Dance Competitively
3. Rock Out on a real Electric a la Rock Band
Let's All Say It Together Now
Sometimes we Christians and by "we", I mean, "I" tend to over-spiritualize things especially when it comes to the not so gentle knocks of life. I tend to skip over the "grieving" process and try to move straight on to the better outlook on life. I don't know why. Probably a subconscious attempt to act/behave/think more "spiritual".
[Oh, the performance trap. Will it never end?]
But it's like, "Really? Is it honestly that healthy to not acknowledge the suckiness of the situation?" Not to say that I should wallow in self-wity like a pig in mud holes, but what I'm saying is to actually recognize that said sucky situation is not cool."
So let's say it together now: "This sucks. PERIOD."
[Oh, the performance trap. Will it never end?]
But it's like, "Really? Is it honestly that healthy to not acknowledge the suckiness of the situation?" Not to say that I should wallow in self-wity like a pig in mud holes, but what I'm saying is to actually recognize that said sucky situation is not cool."
So let's say it together now: "This sucks. PERIOD."
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Unleash the [Punk] Artist Within
It's so short in the back that I can't even make a ponytail.
But I LURVE it. It's like I'm going through the punk phase that never happened back in high school. I didn't have enough security back then to pull this off.
Now to work up the courage to get that tongue ring, and to make a final design decision regarding the tattoo, oh and...AND to learn how to play the guitar so I can rock out on the electric. YEOOOW.
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Five Good Things
I am looking forward to:
1. Hanging out with my dear friends in Waterloo.
2. Grace Toronto's Good Friday and Easter Sunday services.
3. Sushi on Saturday with York peeps.
4. Holding Elijah C. after service on Sunday.
5. Lunch with church friends on Sunday. (I have non- C4C church friends! YAY!!!)
1. Hanging out with my dear friends in Waterloo.
2. Grace Toronto's Good Friday and Easter Sunday services.
3. Sushi on Saturday with York peeps.
4. Holding Elijah C. after service on Sunday.
5. Lunch with church friends on Sunday. (I have non- C4C church friends! YAY!!!)
Tuesday, April 07, 2009
The Cherry On Top
I am officially doing a "Trash the Dress" shoot for a couple that I know this May. This is pretty much the proverbial cherry on top of the proverbial sundae, that is my summer.
Thursday, April 02, 2009
Wednesday, April 01, 2009
The Fives
Five Good Things From This Past 7 Days
1) Hearing Dr. James Orbinski speak. (It was sobering.)
2) Becoming the PR rep for Grace Centre at Grace Toronto.
3) Russ and Mere's wedding
4) Editing pics from Russ and Mere's wedding
5) Swing dancing.
Five Good Things to Come
1) Grace Toronto's Artist Symposium
2) SLEEP, and lots of it
3) Reading the Cross of Christ by John Stott
4) Getting my IBS (Institute for Biblical Studies not irritable bowel syndrome) textbooks
5) That SWEET tax return check
1) Hearing Dr. James Orbinski speak. (It was sobering.)
2) Becoming the PR rep for Grace Centre at Grace Toronto.
3) Russ and Mere's wedding
4) Editing pics from Russ and Mere's wedding
5) Swing dancing.
Five Good Things to Come
1) Grace Toronto's Artist Symposium
2) SLEEP, and lots of it
3) Reading the Cross of Christ by John Stott
4) Getting my IBS (Institute for Biblical Studies not irritable bowel syndrome) textbooks
5) That SWEET tax return check
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