That Great Fear

Burnout has been one of the best things to happen to me because I learned so much about God and myself through it, but I never want to walk through that darkness of the soul again. 

My greatest fear right now is that I might burn out again.
Because apparently, there is little to no recovery from the second time.

I'm not scared of culture shock.
I'm not scared of loneliness.
I'm not scared of not seeing fruit in ministry.
I'm not scared of homesickness.
I'm not scared of stress.
I'm not scared of making a fool out of myself learning a new language, or even languages, plural.
I'm not scared of beginning to hate a cuisine that I love.

But I am scared that together, it'll be too much.  That they'll burn me out.

I'm not scared of adversity.
It's been a great teaching tool in the hands of God.
I'm even starting to learn to embrace it.

But I am scared that one day I might not make it through.

So this is my comfort.

Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name,
you are mine.
When you pass through the waters I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;
when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,
and the flame shall not consume you.
For I am the Lord your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Saviour.
...
Because you are precious in my eyes,
and honored, and 
I love you.
Isaiah 43: 1-2, 4