"Allow a man to win your heart, she would say. And if he doesn’t want to, then why would you want him?"
Wow. How refreshing. That quotation was from a recent post from girltalk.blogs.com. (In case you're wondering it's the Week 6 Book Club Discussion) It wasn't anything new, but it was so good to read it and be reaffirmed in my convictions. It's tempting to want to flirt, to want attention, to feel validated, and to feel in control of one's marital status instead of waiting on the Lord. But I firmly believe in that men are called to initiate.
Call me prudish. Call me uber conservative. Old-fashioned. I'd actually delight in that.
A woman's heart is precious, valuable, and worth being sought after. I'm not going to throw mine at someone who barely cares, or even someone who cares, but not enough. Been there done that. Not doing it again. It's such a lie when guys say they need a sign that the girl is interested before they ask. In Aban's words, "MAN UP." Who wants a coward for a husband?
End Rant.
Footnote: I know John Ensor suggested "crackling leaves" so to speak. Fine, but I'm not talking about that. There are times when girls take crackling leaves to mean chopping down the tree and watching it whack the guy on top of the head.
Hmm, I think I completely agree, and completely disagree with you at the same time...
ReplyDeleteTo start off, when I am interested in a girl, flirting back and forth is what I do. The beginning of a possible relationship is fun, but only if the girl shows some type of interest back. It sounds like you are saying that a girl should not show any interest unless the guy asks directly... Though your footnote clarifies that a bit, sometimes the leaves aren't being crackled loud enough to be heard.
But then again, if a pretty girl I wasn't interested in started throwing herself at me. Chopping down the tree onto my head. I can't trust myself to stay logical at all. So I also completely agree that the guy should do the pursuing, otherwise we'll just get stuck in some sort of a brain loop. "She pretty, she like me, I marry her"
I do think there needs to be some sort of a response from the girl. But if it is too subtle, I will not notice it, write the girl off and label her as a friend. Once that happens, it's hard to get out of that mindset.
Eh, but who knows... I don't think I've really thought about this that deeply yet.